Don’t let me lose the wonder….

I am amused, after the fact of course, at the way God uses little suttle hints to lead up to one of those “a-ha” moments.  Little taps on the shoulder, or whispers in your ear to get your attention.  I had one of those weeks.  Friday I had an eye exam appointment and had no idea that one thought in the midst of that appointment would lead to a revelation about me and where I am in my walk with God.  After having 3 sets of drops applied to my eyes, I sat trying to focus on anything around me.  It is funny to me that they will initially put drops in your eyes that are supposed to “numb” your eyes, but follow up immediately with additonal drops that leave you feeling like you’ve been swimming in a chlorinated pool for about 12 hours!  Then they proceed to touch your eyes with some contraption to test the pressure.  Pressure from what, I ask you??  Too much thinking?  Too much seeing?  They never tell you exactly.  But, I digress!  I sat in the examination chair waiting on the doctor trying to focus on a display on the wall that showed every part of the eye in detail.  Finally, I got up and leaned across the counter to try and read some of the medical terms for each muscle, nerve and part of the eye.  It was amazing!  Then the thought popped into my head, “How could anyone NOT believe in a God who created our eyes with such intricate parts with vital functions to insure that we see color and beauty in a way that our brains can comprehend and are often deeply affected by what we see?”  Then on Saturday I drove across town to visit a friend who was at home recovering from surgery.  I drove down Schillinger Rd. till it dead ends and turned on the road that passes the University of Mobile.  It wasn’t very busy, and it was a beautiful morning.  I enjoyed the beauty of the day.  Tonight in our evening services at church, I listened as Bro. Greg read Psalm 145 and talked about the greatness of God.  I sat alone in my pew deeply moved by the words David wrote thousands of years ago. “Great is the Lord and highly to be praised; and His greatness is unsearchable.”  He challenged us to meditate on the greatness of God.  Not in the way we throw the word “great” around, as if it is one step above “good”…but in the way David wrote of the “bigness” (my word, not David’s OR Bro. Greg’s) of the almighty God.  The God that created the universe and the millions of galaxies that fill that universe.  Then Deann sang a song I have never heard before entitled “Don’t Let Me Lose the Wonder…” In that beautiful haunting voice she has, filled with so much feeling, the words and notes pierced my soul.  I could feel the tightness begin in my chest as I knew God had been drawing me to Him this week with this same thought that now culminated in a moment of realization that He had been trying to get a message across to me.  Somehow, in the midst of doing life, in the midst of running here and there, in the midst of trying to live a life that honored Him, in the midst of struggling to stay away from the “pits” trying to pull me to the the edge and into the darkness, I had lost the wonder of His greatness.  I love Him, yes.  I am thankful to Him for my salvation, yes.  I have faith that He is there for me and will meet my needs, yes.  But, I had lost that sense of wonder of who He is and how great He is.  Tears slid down my cheeks as I listened to the sweetness of her voice and the piercing of the words.  I had lost that wonder.  I found it hard to breathe and sat down and put my head on my arms resting on the back of the pew in front of me.  All I could do was whisper to the Lord that I was sorry and that I wanted that life changing wonder to return to my soul.  I want to see His creation and be amazed.  I want to be moved to tears when I see the delicate fingers of a newborn baby.   I want to feel the stirring of the Holy Spirit in a time of prayer, and be filled with awe that God will allow His spirit to stir the very air around us in evidence He is there.  “Great is the Lord and highly to be praised and His greatness is unsearchable.”  So let me ask you as you read this, have you lost your wonder of a Creator who wants to hang out with us when we are so undeserving?  Allow God to give you a nudge and stir your soul to wonder at His greatness.  I promise you, you will be moved!