Category: Writing

answers, friends, God, Life, People, searching, Uncategorized, Writing

What Now?

dana2day

I am in a weird place.  Not like an actual location or anything.  I haven’t taken a road trip that has gone awry.  I am not in a crowd of people that have an agenda I know nothing about.  But now that I read back over those last three sentences, I have to back track and say they all are pretty accurate, generally speaking.  I’ve been chugging along for the last twenty-eight years as a mother of three daughters.  Thirty years as a wife.  And here and there for periods of time as an employee.   I have been mothering, pushing, washing, feeding, nurturing, loving, disciplining, teaching, wife-ing, cooking, chauffeuring, guiding and loving three girls and a husband.  Mixed in with that, I have been teaching Sunday school to mostly 11th & 12th grade girls, serving in Women’s Ministry, singing in the choir, and many other ministries here and there. But today, I am sitting in a quiet house, wondering.  Wondering what now.

I’m not sure who I am now.  Before you become concerned that I am a writer with dementia, I know who I am, but I don’t know WHO I am.   I’m not despondent.  I’m not even downcast or depressed.  I’m trying not to measure myself to unrealistic expectations or compare myself to all the amazing women of God out there making a difference!

I know things I want to do.  Like have a clean house.  Don’t laugh.  It hasn’t been uber clean in months.  Our oldest daughter and her family have been living with us while they are looking for and buying a house.  So, keeping the house perfect has been low on the list and enjoying our grandson living in our house 24/7 has been at the top of that list!!!  I have to say he is the cutest baby you’ve ever seen and having him here has helped us acclimate to being Lolly and Pop, especially considering he’ll be getting a baby sister in four short months.  They are now about to close on their house and will be moving next week.  Our middle girl child has been living her new married life to her sweet man  in a downtown loft.  She is now realizing her dream of working from home and as we’ve always said, we’ll all be working for her one day!   The baby girl of the family is getting married in just over ninety days.  Ninety-four to be exact.  Our baby girl.  She was an unexpected blessing twenty years ago.  I know God has her here for a specific purpose because she was not in our plans, in fact we were done and moving on in life with the two beautiful girls we had!  I have both smiled at her boldness to get married so young and cried that she’ll be off doing her own life without me in ninety four days.  I keep saying she’s not old enough, that they don’t know what they’re doing, they aren’t ready.  But then God reminds me that He created her, He saved her, He has a plan for her life, not me.  She and her fiancé love Jesus and are gonna follow Him, not my plan.

Back to this weird place.  So I am soon to be out of the mothering job and I am not working a job outside our home any longer.  This happened last year while my sweet man was going through cancer treatment.  It was both a blessing and a difficulty at the same time.  But God has taken care of us, as always, and after much deliberation (mostly on my part), my man said he wanted me to stay home.  So this weird place has taken away the two things that have been consistent for some time in my life.  I don’t know why I’m so lost, because I have wanted to have the freedom to write and now I have it.  And yet.  And yet I don’t know what to write.  We write to inspire others.  We write to tell stories.  We write to unleash the words that fill our brains every minute of every day.  I am sure if we could look inside an average person’s brain and the brain of a writer we would see that the writer is constantly writing about life as it is observed.  Always adding to the story.  Always editing.  Always creating. The words never stop swirling.

So this weird place is me standing, no, sitting, in my chair, staring at a computer screen.  Me, looking around at the things that need to be done.  Me, longing to be some kind of spiritual giant that could inspire people to cling to Jesus in every area of their lives.  Me, longing to finally get a handle on losing weight and finally finding victory over the scale. Me, measuring myself up to the expectations in my head and failing miserably.  Me, crying and asking God to please help me be good at something.  Help me find success at something.  And ultimately, just giving in and finding a quiet, cool place in the house to take a nap, to think about these things another day.  I’m 58 years old.  I have no degree.  I’m an okay writer, but not a profoundly gifted writer.  I am not particularly disciplined.  I don’t look like Beth Moore or speak like Priscilla Shirer.  I never quite meet the expectations in my head.  I think I may have wasted this life that God gave me.

This weird place has locked doors right now.  I feel like I’m standing in the middle of this weird place, completely baffled at what I am to do next.  What door do I choose? I’m frozen.  Not sure what I’m supposed to do next.  I preach to my daughters and my Sunday school girls all the time that “God has a plan for your life, now go walk in it”.  But here I am, in this weird place, wondering if there really is a plan for me and, if so, what that plan for my life is!

 

answers, escape, God, Life, Love, People, promises, searching, Uncategorized, Writing

Cast Your Burdens

dana2day

God is faithful. He is. Really. Even when I am not. I am not faithful to remember all He has done for me when I am in the midst of an overwhelming circumstance. It’s easy for me to say those words to someone else who is crumbling beneath a difficult situation or an overwhelming state of mind. But then just moments later, it seems, I am sitting here, throat constricted, my mind chaotic with possible answers to a problem, instead of taking a deep breath and releasing my burdens into His capable outstretched arms.

“Come to me, all who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you, and learn from me, for I am gentle and lowly in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy, and my burden is light.”. Matthew 11:29-30

It’s interesting to me, that given this word from the Lord, we still take our burdens to the feet of Jesus, lament and cry and beg for answers or resolutions or even for Him to take them from us, but then we promptly get up, pick up the burden and walk away. I want to learn from Him, I want to lay my burden at His feet and trust His hand. But I am a control freak. I am a dweller. I hold the situation or issue in my hand, study it, dwell on it and try to figure the best way to resolve it. I’m not so good at releasing my burdens into His hands. The crazy part is this: after I’ve struggled over it, lost sleep over it, tried my ideas on it, I finally come to His feet and just fall in a puddle of tears with my hands still clinching the burden. And, just as He promised in these verses, He pries my sweaty hands from the burden, brushes my hair back from my tear stained face as I relax and release it into His capable hands. He comforts me and calms my spirit and I finally rest. I wish that I could say I do not repeat this process very often, but it isn’t true. I am stubborn and willful. I am a child of God still learning that I am not in control. He is. Still learning that life is easier when a burden comes into my life if I instantly snatch it up and race to the feet of Jesus and quickly place it in His hands.

What burden is weighing you down today? Release it dear friend into the Savior’s hands and then pick up His yoke which is about peace and rest, and the. watch Him do His thing in that situation!

cancer, escape, friends, Laughter, Life, Uncategorized, Writing

Rock and Roll, Baby!

dana2day

Last night something was confirmed about me that may surprise many of you. I am not a rocker. I know you are shocked and surprised. I’m not even a poser. (I had to look that term up, fyi) It was evident by my lack of knowledge about the music or words to the signature songs of the band. I spent more time entertained by the people in attendance than the actual concert. My husband and I were given tickets by sweet friends to a concert by The Black Jacket Symphony: A Night at the Opera and The Best of Queen. My big guy was very excited about hearing favorite songs of his younger years. I confess that I wondered what kind of opera the symphony would play. I honestly expected an orchestra. I was wrong! I am not completely in the dark, I do know who Queen is, but I didn’t realize it would be a real deal rock and roll night! You may not believe this, but I’ve never been to a rock concert. It’s true! I know I’ve surprised you again.

Parking was the first step to getting to our night of rocking and rolling….obviously not an easy task in downtown Mobile when a rock concert is about to happen! We finally parked in a church parking lot with a sign that said “Private Parking for…(and I’ll leave the church name out here just in case someone wants to report two rebellious fifty somethings!): Violators will be ticketed or towed at owners expense. I was a little anxious as we got out of the car and proudly walked toward the theatre, impressed by our night of living on the wild side. I secretly asked God to forgive us and please allow the car to still be there when the night was over!

As we entered the door of the Saenger I was asked to open my purse for security. I looked at my big guy and asked, “Are these people famous?” The security guy asked him if he had any weapons. He confessed to a pocket knife and suddenly the guys hands went up and said “You can’t enter with a weapon, sir.” I looked around at the other security people standing ready to pounce, beginning to wonder if the real Queen was in the house. My sweet husband informed me later that the lead singer died in 1985. He handed over his knife, it was obvious to me that it was worth the sacrifice to hear the band! We then walked to another security checkpoint and were scanned with a wand for any other concealed weapons. This didn’t make me feel comfortable about the obvious possibilities of events that could happen if there was this much concern for what people would carry into the concert hall! We finally got to our seats and waited. We were in the balcony, third row, dead center. Perfect view of the stage. I noted the massive speakers hanging from the ceiling, both sides angled right at us. This wasn’t going to be good. There was an atmosphere of excitement all around me. As I watched people, which I love to do, I realized the average age in the room was somewhere in the mid fifties. But the energy was more like a crowd of twenty somethings! I noted the lights, the instruments and party like atmosphere. Suddenly the lights went down and the band ran out. The crowd went crazy. The lead singer belted out lyrics and people were screaming. I looked hard at the singer trying to recognize him. I did not. But then a familiar tune came, Bohemian Rhapsody. I looked at my big guy and said “I know this!”, but my words were lost somewhere in the midst of the screaming crowd and the blasting music. He leaned down and I got as close to his ear as possible and I repeated my words. He smiled and nodded. I still don’t think heard me….but I saw the smile on his face as he took in the loud music and I knew he was having a good time. I found myself watching people more than the concert as they got lost in the music, reliving the moments of the 70’s and 80’s when they first heard the songs. People were standing and dancing, hands in the air and singing at the top of their lungs. These people knew every word. Then I heard a familiar beat….the crowd began to stomp, stomp, clap, stomp, stomp, clap. I looked at my man with shock, it was my high school senior class song! I found myself following along and singing “We will, we will, rock you”. I was no longer a fish out of water. A square peg in a round hole. I was a rocker! They sang Crazy Little Thing Called Love and Another One Bites the Dust. I suddenly felt cool because I knew these songs. I didn’t know all the words, but I knew the songs. At the end of the night, my ears were numb and I honestly was glad to be headed home. I observed something as I left. It was 10:15pm and the crowd that had just been jamming out for two hours were leaving in an orderly manner, laughing and chatting as we exited the nearly 100 year old Saenger Theatre. Forty years ago, these same people would have been jumping up and down demanding an encore still full of youthful energy, demanding to be blown away by the rock band, Queen. We made it back to the church parking lot (along with many other concert attendees) and our car was still there and no ticket on the windshield. Prayer works! We drove home and I listened to my sweet man talk about the band and how good they were and how fun it was to hear some of his favorite songs. I listened and thought how thankful I was for the gift of tickets for us to enjoy a non -typical night out for this “square” chick, and to sit next to my man who has had such a difficult year. All I can say is…..rock on!

escape, friends, God, Life, Love, People, promises, searching, Uncategorized, Writing
dana2day

It’s 2018.  It’s 2018 people!  I graduated in 1979!  I remember singing “we’re gonna party like it’s 1999” thinking that seemed like a lifetime away!  Here we are nearly 20 years beyond that!  So far 2018 isn’t stacking up so well.  I have battled the flu not once, but twice already.  Followed by a diagnosis of pneumonia!  Add to this trying to make the right decision for the “next step” for my 77 year old father who is having memory issues, as well as health issues and the first 23 days of 2018 have been beyond stressful!  So this week he’ll come to live with us from the nursing and rehab facility that he has been held captive (according to him) since December 22nd.  They have informed us that he can no longer live alone, nor can he drive.  He has not come to grips with giving up his keys to his car, so we will take measures into our own hands and hide the car and the keys!  He can’t be trusted!  They have also informed us of indicators of the beginning of dementia.  So, after many tears and wringing of hands, we have made application to a veterans facility near us.  This has brought on a whole other realm of guilt that tortures me daily.  But I have to stick out my chin and realize that his care will require more that we can handle.  Add to this the logistical measures we have had to take in coordinating packing up his apartment and preparing a place in our home and I feel like I have aged ten years over the last 2 months.   I am beginning to understand the statement that I am now in the “sandwich generation”.  This year holds other events that should over shadow the stress of the last few months, and I hope they will.  A grandbaby in April and a wedding in November.  My husband and I selfishly were hoping to finally get around to us…. to road trips, to vacations, to fun filled Saturdays just the two of us.  But I think those days are yet to come.    I want to celebrate this new year, but so far I don’t necessarily feel in a celebratory mood.  I’m mostly just tired!  I normally love the beginning of a new year…. a chance to set new goals, to look expectantly to what the year will hold. I promise myself to write more, blog more and read more.  I start new exercise programs hoping this will be the year I shed 50 pounds.  I dream of a spotless house that resembles a magazine picture (that in remembrance of my sweet mother who tried to motivate me as a teenager to make everything look unrealistically like a picture of perfection in a magazine!).  I plan to realize my dream of being published.  I hope for a year of spiritual revelations from the Lord.  But not this year.  So far I’ve struggled through weeks of sickness, contemplating the future for my Dad and looking around at my house that is in a state of chaos over moving rooms around to accommodate my Dad’s needs.  Can I just get a witness from someone else who has survived this season of life and lived to tell about it?

answers, escape, friends, God, Laughter, Life, Love, People, promises, searching, Uncategorized, Writing

What do you need…..

dana2day

What do you need?  What will make your life complete?  What thing would you do over and do differently?  What would make you happy?  There is so much this world has to offer to satisfy what ever is making you hungry.  Hungry for love.  Hungry for attention.  Hungry for admiration.  Hungry for fame.  Hungry for fortune.  But none is satisfying.  None of it quenches that thing inside you needing to be rescued and answered.  There is one thing alone that will wipe away the endless grasping, the endless longing, the endless quest to be satisfied….to be happy.  The loved of God can wipe away every dark place we hide in our souls of things we hope never flashes across social media or finds it way to the ears of those we love.  He alone can rescue our battered hearts from perpetual longing to be loved.  He alone can wipe our slates clean. He alone forgives and forgets.  He alone makes us new and clean and fresh and free.  His Son made that sacrifice.  His Son paid the price.  His Son thought of us.  He made a way for us to walk weightless through this journey of life.  He became the bridge between us and God, making a way for us to freely come into the very presence every moment of every day.  Imagine that we believe, we repent, we are forgiven and we immediately have access to the Almighty God who is everywhere, all the time, the One who created everything, who always was and will always be.

Choose today my friends.  Choose now, while you read this post.  It’s no mistake that you are here, now, reading this.  It’s a divine appointment.  Choose Jesus.

Message me if you need someone to walk with you.

 

friends, God, Laughter, Life, Love, People, promises, Uncategorized, Writing

What I want this Mother’s Day….

dana2day

If I could truly have a wish this Mother’s Day, I would wish to have my own Mom back. Sitting close beside me on her couch, magazine in her lap, nail file in her hand shaping her already perfect nails and softly laughing as we talk.  She’d reach over and take my hand and begin shaping my nails, telling me I should slow down and take time for a manicure.  But she is not here to wrap her arms around me, to rub my back as she holds me, whispering in my ear that everything will be okay and that He is in control.  

What I want this Mother’s day is not a fancy dinner, it’s not jewelry or a gift card.  I want grace.  A boat load of it.  Grace that covers the million mistakes I made over the last twenty-five years.  Grace that covers the ridiculous idea that I had to do everything right in order for my daughters to turn out right.  Grace that covers too many times I gave into the frustration and yelled at them.  Grace that erases my inconsistencies and my unrealistic ideas.  Grace that would replace my mistakes with perfect responses and patient replies.  Grace that would take my lame attempts at teaching them the Word of God and turn them into precious moments that ingrained a deep desire to follow after Him their entire lives.  Grace for the moments I collapsed in an overwhelmed heap of tears and cried out to Him asking Him to fix something.  I need more grace….and maybe a bubble bath.

 

 

friends, God, Laughter, Life, Love, promises, Uncategorized, Writing
dana2day

Today I am gloomy.  Maybe it’s the stormy weather outside.  I don’t think so.  For the last few days I have been lost in my own thoughts. Some would say they are just the lies of the enemy.  But I am not sure, because most are true.  I have realized at nearly 55 years old that I have wasted this life He gave me.  I haven’t accomplished anything of value.  I mentally made a list of the things that prove my uselessness.  The list is in my head….well, actually it now in this blog goes something lik:

  1. I never made straight A’s or was I at the top of my class.  I was average. A “B” student.
  2. I never learned to play or became proficient on any musical instrument.
  3. I am an average singer. A “choir voice” as someone once put it.
  4. I started but did not finish college.
  5. I have had little to no success at achieving significant weight loss.
  6. I have done nothing profoundly amazing or world changing for God.
  7. I have a tendency to not finish things or consistently stick with something.
  8. I never became really good at any one sport.
  9. I have never done anything adventurous like hiking in the mountains or zip-lining or bungie jumping.
  10. I can cook, but nothing spectacular.
  11. I want to be a writer, yet I don’t have any major accomplishment or published work to show for it. So, technically that means I am not a writer.
  12. I am not that good at memorizing scripture.  I’m not that good at memorizing anything!
  13. I’m just not good or outstanding at anything.

There is more, but I am sure you are becoming bored with the list already. There is a point to this post.  So stay with me.  So I am riding to work, contemplating how much of a loser I am, when my phone dings that I have a text message. It’s the daily devotional text that Molly set up on my phone, God bless her!  “Devotional: Trust what is.  Learn from what was and have faith in what will be.”  Then with perfect timing, as always, the familiar song that touched my heart the first time I heard it:

The Glorious Unfolding

Lay your head down tonight

Take a rest from the fight
Don’t try to figure it out
Just listen to what I’m whispering to your heart
‘Cause I know this is not
Anything like you thought
The story of your life was gonna be
And it feels like the end has started closing in on you
But it’s just not true
There’s so much of the story that’s still yet to unfold

And this is going to be a glorious unfolding
Just you wait and SEE and you will be amazed
You’ve just got to believe the story is so far from over
So hold on to every promise God has made to us
And watch this glorious unfolding

God’s plan from the start
For this world and your heart
Has been to show His glory and His grace
Forever revealing the depth and the beauty of
His unfailing Love
And the story has only begun

We were made to run through fields of forever
Singing songs to our Savior and King
So let us remember this life we’re living
Is just the beginning of the beginning

Of this glorious unfolding
We will watch and SEE and we will be amazed
If we just keep on believing the story is so far from over
And hold on to every promise God has made to us
We’ll SEE the glorious unfolding

Just watch and SEE (unfolding)
This is just the beginning of the beginning (unfolding)

Those words penned by Steven Curtis Chapman, whether he realizes it or not, were written from God to my heart.  This is the second time God has used it to pull me up out of the pit.  I didn’t cry though, I listened instead.  I let the truth of the song penetrate the darkness that was swirling around me.  Suddenly thoughts came one after another.  Sure, I might seem average, unsuccessful, invisible, unimportant and useless by the worlds standards.  But. (and I love this) I am good at one important thing.  I am good at believing the truth of who God is.  I am good at holding on tightly to the thread of hope and faith that gives me life.  I believe.  I believe that Jesus is the son of God.  I believe that He thought I was worth leaving heaven to come and sacrifice His life for me.  I believe that when He hung on that cross, I was on His mind.  I believe that He died there on the cross for my sins, so I would not have to.  I believe He shattered the darkness of death and conquered the grave by walking straight out of that tomb three days later and shocking the stinking pants off everyone who saw Him, heard Him, tried hard to comprehend Him, or believed by faith He was who He said He was.  Then He just hung out with them for 40 days before ascending to sit at the right hand of His Father!  I believe that everyday, whether I feel like it or not, He, God, the creator of the universe, the creator of man, this inconceivable sacrificial lover of humans is with me. Me! Me? Why?  I don’t get it. I don’t understand why He would love me so. I’m such a disappointment!  Yet He does love me.  He stays with me.  He makes a way for me.  He takes care of me.  He listens to the pathetic thoughts that swim around in my head.  He cares enough to take time to remind me, to tell  me, that I am worth it to Him.  That He will never forsake me.  That He isn’t concerned with achievements, talents or successes, He is only concerned with my heart.  And while my heart struggles to not focus on the world but to focus on Him, He sees me.  He knows me.  He loves me.  I would have been exhausted with me by now! But not Him.  He keeps showing up and proving His love for me is real and unconditional.  I believe in a God who is who He says He is!

None of this changes the fact that I am ordinary or unimportant by the worlds standards or by my misguided standards.  But it does change the feeling that I am worth it to Him.  He’ll use me somehow.  I just have to be willing.  I will continue to believe.  I will do my best to live for Him.

escape, Life, promises, Writing

From baby steps to big girl panties…..

dana2day

Today, after weeks of melancholy….(Don’t  you love that word?  It so adequately fits the definition of, well, melancholy.  To be “soberly thoughtful, pensive”) or as my dear friend of 34 years says a bad case of the “can’t help-it’s and the mully-grubs” I took a big step forward and registered my blog domain.  Stop rolling your eyes, it’s a big deal in my world.   It means I’m serious about this blog.  It means I need to get off my fanny and pursue this writing thing.  It means I need to quit wallowing (look it up, it’s a real word) around in my mud puddle of melancholy, get up, rinse the mud off and face forward.  The sad thing about people who have a writer’s heart….they tend to wallow….they tend to allow the mully-grubs to just take over completely, and pretty soon they are wallowing all up in that melancholy mud puddle and they are enjoying it! Pretty much a “woe is me” attitude prevails.   I’m pretty sure God isn’t pleased with me right now, because I’ve pretty much been up to my chin in melancholy for weeks.  I just imagine Him shaking His head and sighing “Will she ever learn to trust me….”
So…anyway, enough of chasing that squirrel!  This registering my blog domain thing has now made me accountable.   It is going to require me to actually, well, you know, write!  No more whining, no more excuses, no more procrastinating.    So, to quote a t-shirt that my cousin gave me a few years ago, “Put on your big girl panties and deal” …I’m taking a big step forward, putting on my big girl panties and dealing.

God, Life, Love, People, promises, Uncategorized, Writing

More promises….

dana2day

18 “I will not leave you as orphans; I will come to you. 19 Yet a little while and the world will see me no more, but you will see me. Because I live, you also will live. 20 In that day you will know that I am in my Father, and you in me, and I in you. 21 Whoever has my commandments and keeps them, he it is who loves me. And he who loves me will be loved by my Father, and I will love him and manifest myself to him.” John 14:18-20

John 14 has so many promises in it. Promises that are both comforting and exciting.
• I go and prepare a place for you
• I will come again
• I will come and get you
• Where I am, you will be also
• I am the way, the truth and the life
• Whatever you ask in my name, I will do
• I will give you a helper
• I will not leave you as orphans
• I will come to you
• You will see me
• Because I live, you will live also
• He who loves me, will be loved by the Father
• I will love him (me) and will manifest (reveal, appear) myself to him (me)
• The Holy Spirit will teach you all things and will help you remember all I have said to you
• Peace I give you

That’s 15 promises in one chapter. Amazing, huh! I am astonished by the limitless ways Jesus understood us so well after walking around and hanging out with us humans for 33 years. He knew exactly what we needed to hear. He still knows exactly what we need to hear. We are such needy and high maintenance creatures….emotionally and physically. We need
constant reassurance and reminders of who we are in Him and just how much He loves us. Only the sacrifice He made on the cross was powerful enough to still move us over 2,000 years later to the point of surrendering our lives to a Savior who gave it all up to save a human race who literally lives every day at some level of selfishness. We struggle and are conflicted daily with our inner man. We want to sell out to this all-powerful God, we want to live a life that gives voice to our commitment to a Savior that sacrificed His own life for a world of people. But the sinful part of our nature screams for us to look inward and consider only our own thoughts and our own desires. But then God does His thing. He shoots a ray of light that pierces our soul and something eternal swells inside us and we are reminded of the love He showers on us moment by moment. He is such a compassionate God. Why else would we still be taking one more breath. The most amazing part is that He isn’t just doing this inside me, or you, He’s doing this inside all of His children. That promise of His spirit dwelling inside us, yeah, that spirit swirling and moving in our hearts, it’s a sensation that we who share that bond of His salvation experience together, as one. I love Him! Because at any moment, whether sitting at my desk, walking in the mountains, putting my toes in the waves washing up on the beautiful beaches He created, His spirit stirs in me reminding me of these very promises written in black and white and spoken thousands of years ago by our precious Jesus. He loves me and will reveal himself to me….who doesn’t just want to squeal with delight and run and give our heavenly Father a big ole’ hug!

Life, People, Uncategorized, Writing

God to the rescue….

dana2day

4/18/14
A lot. Yes a lot goes on inside my head. There are a million
things I want to accomplish but there is never enough time.
Yesterday I was on the way to work, sliding on that familiar
slope of hatin’ on myself. Hatin’ that I am getting older,
time is passing quickly and I don’t seem to have accomplished
anything of real importance. Throw in the fact that I don’t
feel like I’m doing anything of eternal value, and yes, you
can imagined I was sliding down that slope fast, headed
straight for the pit! Suddenly I heard the words flowing out
of the radio, words of affirmation, words that said God wasn’t
done with my story, words that touched me in a place that
only God knows is some time painful. He heard my cry
before I even let it slip from my lips. He heard the words
rolling around inside my head. He felt the tears burning
my eyes and the lump rising in my throat. He. The God who
sent His Son to die for me, the creator of the universe, heard me.
Me. Insignificant,inconsistent, frustrated, self-condemning,
discontented me. He ran beneath me like a safety net, scooping me
up from my downward spiral and carefully put my feet back on
solid ground. I felt Him reassuring me that the story He
has written for my life is just beginning to unfold. Hope.
Now I have hope. Now I have anticipation. Now I have
expectation. Only God could have and would have
intervened for this girl….this woman….this child of His.